Just about a year ago, Candy called me to remind me she would be on vacation for about 3 weeks. Craig, Candy and Tyler would be headed to one of their favorite places to go, Kalaloch. Somewhere in Washington. She told me she had not been feeling well and had been taking Tylenol every day. She had just gone to an Instacare because she suspected a bladder infection or something like that. It was neither and the person at the Instacare told her to come back if it didn't get better. Candy had wanted to go see her own doctor but she wasn't available until after Candy got back from vacation. Candy is one to never let anything slow her down and by taking Tylenol she felt good enough to enjoy her vacation.
When she got back she was able to get in to see her own doctor. They weren't sure what they were dealing with and suspected that it might be diverticulitis. After the phone call, I kept hoping it wasn't diverticulitis. I had a neighbor that has this dreaded disease and she really suffers sometimes and I couldn't stand the thought of Candy having to suffer like that.
It wasn't long after that, that Candy called and said that her doctor wanted her to go see a GYN Oncologist. They were starting to suspect that it might be a cancer of some kind, uterine, ovarian, etc. I was shocked speechless. No, no not that, not that was my one thought. I did not want my sister to have that. I already knew about that cancer. I watched my mother-in-law die from that cancer. I watched my dear friend die from that cancer. I prayed that there would be a mistake and it would be something else, even diverticulitis.
Candy was scheduled for surgery on September 10, 2010. I was so far away from her. I am half a world away in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. What I didn't understand and probably didn't want to understand is that there probably was never a doubt about her cancer. I just thought that her surgery was just to find out what she had. It was extensive and confirmed my worst fears, and that was she had ovarian cancer and it was at a C-III. I am not going to get technical about it. Those things just don't come to my mind very well. It was bad, very bad.
Oh the beauty of the internet. It will tell you everything, explain everything. You cannot have any delusions. This cancer has a terrible cure rate. She might have only two years, maybe more. There are always those who beat it. I of course wanted Candy to be one of those.
Let's stop a minute and give me a chance to tell you something about this sister of mine. She is special. She has always been special. We have a high-strung family. We are noisy and volatile. Candy was the peacemaker in our family. She calmed us down. I was a fighter and protector of the kids. Candy kept me from losing control. Because of Candy we grew up loving and caring for each other. Friends not enemies. She loved us all, all the time.
Candy and I were close. We were born only 13 months apart. We always stayed in the same bedroom. We slept together many nights in the same bed. We even stayed together in our own house. It was a guest cottage off the main house, and Candy and I got to stay there through our highschool years. We stayed in the same room, until Mom fixed up the living room for Candy to have her own bedroom. I was upset by that. I just couldn't imagine sleeping in another room from Candy. We were still so close to each other that we could call out to each other. I managed to be able to handle that.
We shared our birthdays even when they were a month apart. We double dated and we did so many other things together. We did have our own friends and our own lives but still so much of what we did was together. I loved her and loved being with her.
I was so proud of her and her accomplishments. I never resented her. I was never jealous of her and I could have been. She was so pretty. Probably just the most beautiful person that I knew. She was so smart. I remember one time when I was at swiming practice and she had come from Fairmont to Sanger High School for a track meet. She came over to the pool to see me in her cute green track and field outfit. The guys that I had thought were just the coolest in my Freshman class saw her. After she left, they came over to me (boy was I thrilled) and wanted to know who that cute girl was. I was so proud to tell them that the cute girl was my sister, Candy.
So Candy, my wonderful sister, Candy was a living doll. She was sweet, smart, beautiful; and I loved her with all my heart.
After her surgery, we now knew what we faced. She would have a few weeks of recovery and then she would start chemo therapy. Well our whole family got in gear for this long fight. I was able to come be with her her first week out of the hospital. I still remember walking into her house after my long trip to Houston. She was sitting on the couch and I put all my stuff down and just went over and put my arms around her and we both just cried.
I loved caring for her. She got better every day. She would get up and walk around every day. I would make her a tiny little breakfast, and a tiny little lunch. For dinners, she ate a tiny little bit. She spent most of her day in bed. Craig had just gotten her a new blue ray TV that he hung on the wall. It was wonderful. We watched some DVD movies and lots of home improvement and cooking shows on TV. It was fun.
When I came I brought her a heart necklace so that she would know how much I loved her each time she wore it. I also brought her a memory box with some cute little items inside it. I wanted her to to remember our shared memories and know that I wanted her life to be bright and beautiful.
As I was there, my other sisters started to come. Tami first, then Vicki. Tami was the whirl wind. Boy can that girl work. I cleaned and cooked and did laundry. She and Vicki did the deep cleaning and Tami also worked in the yard. Penny seemed to get things organized so that Candy would never have one single chemo therapy treatment without one of us being there.
I could only stay a week, but knew that Candy would be well taken care of by my other wonderful sisters.
I was lucky enough to be able to add an extra week to my R&R to visit Candy again and be with her during one of her chemotherapy sessions. I couldn't believe it when she actually came and picked me up at the airport. She had some of her energy back. I drove her to her doctor's appointments, and chemo treatments spending the day with her. I helped pick up Tyler, always one of Candy's main concerns. We drove around to a few of his prospective High Schools dropping off his grades and request to be considered for attendance the next year. We were busy as usual. Keeping up with Candy even in her slower state is daunting. We even got a chance to go out to lunch and a movie. I helped her put all of her Thanksgiving stuff away and we decorated for Christmas. She was very careful with herself and contact with others. She had gotten really sick with flues and colds because of her diminished capacity to fight off these illnesses due to her cancer treatments. So she had to stay away from people. I know that had to be hard on her, because she g
I was thrilled with her prognosis and her continued improvements in health. I had no doubt that Candy would be one of those who beat this cancer. She was in such good health. She always laughed as she said except for cancer she was in the best of health. And she was. She had kept her weight in check through the years. She didn't have high blood pressure or high cholesterol or anything of that kind. She still played volleyball and basketball at Church and tried to walk every day. She had the best attitude. She loved life and had too many things she till wanted to accomplish. I just knew that she would beat this.
We started to look towards the future. She and Craig had wanted to take a trip around the world and Malaysia was on the docket. We planned to spend about a week in Australia and then they would come to KL to visit my home and spend a few days here. I put it on my calendar and put in leave slips with my boss.
She had one more treatment and then freedom, glorious freedom. She would have to have a scan, but that was just a precaution. Her numbers indicating cancer had been below the cancer range for months now. She was getting ready to go to Utah to be with my Dad for his 90th birthday and just before she left she found out that the scan showed a few little marks. It could be an indication the cancer was back or it could just be scar tissue, but the doctor wanted her to have three more chemo treatments just to be absolutely sure. This was normal, nothing really to worry about. All Candy wanted was it to be over with so she could go into remission and get on with her life. We were not worried, yet!
She had the second treatment and then her cancer numbers started to rise. Not by much and still well below an indication of her cancer being back, but it gave me a chill nonetheless. I was not new to this. I had already been through this as mentioned with my mother-in-law and a good friend. I was scared but didn't want to even think that Candy might not survive this. It was ridiculous. Candy worked to hard at being well, she was too good for the Lord not to grant her wish to live.
The thing is that we prayed for her, we all prayed for her. We fasted and fasted for her recovery. Candy was needed here. She had a little boy that needed her. She was a major force in her grandchildren's lives. She also had a husband she adored and who needed her. There just would be no substitute for her. SHE WAS NEEDED HERE!!! Friends, neighbors and family all depended on her. She was a remarkable force for good. We prayed and pled with the Lord. He would have no doubt as to our love and need of Candy.
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